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Joke texts: Short jokes
“Short jokes” messages
Why did the scarecrow win an award? He was outstanding in his field.
I used to be a baker, but I couldn't make enough dough.
Why did the bicycle fall over? It was two-tired.
I told my suitcase there'd be no vacation this year. Now I'm dealing with emotional baggage.
Why don't eggs tell jokes? They might crack each other up.
I wanted to learn how to make a belt. It was a waist of time.
What do you call a sleeping bull? A bulldozer.
I used to be afraid of hurdles, but I got over it.
Why did the cookie go to the doctor? It felt crummy.
What do clouds wear under their clothes? Thunderwear.
Why did the math book look sad? It had too many problems.
I'm on a seafood diet. I see food and I eat it.
Why did the coffee file a police report? It got mugged.
What did one wall say to the other? I'll meet you at the corner.
Why can't your nose be twelve inches long? Then it'd be a foot.
I tried to catch fog yesterday. I mist.
Why did the tomato blush? It saw the salad dressing.
What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Nacho cheese.
Why was the broom late? It swept in.
I wondered why the baseball kept getting bigger. Then it hit me.
What kind of tree fits in your hand? A palm tree.
Why did the banana go to the doctor? It wasn't peeling well.
I used to play piano by ear, but now I use my hands.
What's a computer's favorite snack? Microchips.
Why was the calendar nervous? Its days were numbered.
What do you call a fish without eyes? Fsh.
Why did the picture go to jail? It was framed.
What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta.
Why did the bicycle stay home? It was feeling tired.
What did the ocean say to the beach? Nothing — it just waved.
Why did the music teacher need a ladder? To reach the high notes.
What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear.
I made a pencil with two erasers. It was pointless.
Why did the golfer bring two pairs of trousers? In case he got a hole in one.
What did the zero say to the eight? Nice belt!
Why did the student eat their homework? The teacher said it was a piece of cake.
How do trees get online? They log in.
What do you call a can opener that doesn't work? A can't opener.
Why was the stadium so cool? It was full of fans.
I used to be a banker, but I lost interest.
Why don't skeletons fight? They don't have the guts.
What did one plate say to the other? Dinner is on me.
Why did the orange stop rolling? It ran out of juice.
What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.
Why did the clock get hungry? It went back four seconds.
What do you call a happy cowboy? A jolly rancher.
Why did the phone wear glasses? It lost its contacts.
What did the left eye say to the right eye? Between us, something smells.
Why did the little cloud stay home? It felt under the weather.
What do you call a dinosaur with a big vocabulary? A thesaurus.
Why did the book join the police? It wanted to go undercover.
What did the grape do when it got stepped on? It let out a little wine.
